Removing the unremovable

It's creating cards like these that make smile on days when the DOW falls 200 points taking my savings down with it and my middle child (that would be Luke - who - technically - is the middle child born 2 minutes before his twin sister) spits Yo-Kidz tube yogurt all over my shirt while attempting to make zerbert noises.

I created the card for one of my friends in book club who is due in about 3 weeks with her 1st baby. Heaven help her. She knows not what she's in for. She could get a child like my little Lukie.

Jack, my sweet boy, never wrote on walls. He never ripped up books or took apart the vacuum cleaner to see how "it works" (Luke's newest phrase). Jack was predictable in his habits and has always appeared more mature than his peers. Lucy seems to be following in his footsteps save a few dramatic moments... ie... no one should dare try and remove the child's shoes from her feet. Luke, however, has me puzzling until my puzzler is sore. I thought I had put away all the pens, markers, crayons, etc, yet today he somehow finds a stray black, ball-point pen, and I spend the next 30 minutes removing said ball point from my door and walls with my new best friend - Magic Eraser. (By the way, Magic Eraser will take off the cheap-o Monarch paint that builder's use in all newly constructed homes.) Saturday he found some "washable" paint. He painted the carpet at the top of the stairs brown. Mark discovered this when Luke came running up to him with a beaming, proud smile plastered across his face and showed him his very brown hands. At first, Mark thought Luke had performed some unexpected craftiness with the contents of his diaper. Luckily, it was just (supposedly) washable paint. Luke operates on 2 modes - create and destroy. Both of which having me cleaning up after him - or saving his life since he has a fascination with light sockets and has managed to remove the "unremovable" protectors from the wall - during all of his waking hours.

*sigh* Do they make straight jackets for toddlers? Just kidding. Seriously.